Who Are The Stalkers?
Forensic psychologists who have studied stalkers generally divide them into four general
categories. Each stalker is different and may show signs from different categories.
1) Simple Obsessional
Thought to be the most common, in this kind of stalking, the stalker generally has a
previous relationship with his victim. The relationship could be marriage, a
romance, a friendship, a date, a co-worker, an employee, etc. Remember
"Fatal Attraction"? Glen Close played a simple obsessional stalker. In
"Sleeping With The Enemy", Julia Roberts was married to a simple obsessional
stalker. They can be dangerous - don't let the word "simple" fool you!
These stalkers, being the most common, are also the most well studied. They are
known to be generally immature, socially incompetent and unable to maintain relationships,
jealous, insecure, paranoid, feel helpless and powerless, and have very low self esteem.
If your stalker says, "You are my life," you should believe it. He
thinks so little of himself that he believes literally that he is nothing without you.
Because of this reasoning, he will often go to extreme measures to see to it that he gets
you.
2) Love Obsessional
The stalking cases that make the news are the most dramatic and the most bizarre.
When most people think of stalking, they think of John Hinkley shooting the President to
impress Jodie Foster. John Bardo stalked the actress Rebecca Shaffer and shot her
dead in 1989, and as a direct result, California passed stalking laws. The other
states followed suit.
Those are examples of love obsessional stalkers. The good news is that they are
reported to be only about a fourth as common as simple obsessional cases. The bad
news is that the vast majority of these cases are ordinary people and not celebrities at
all. That means that, yes, it could happen to you. If you thought you couldn't
be stalked by a crazy stranger because you aren't famous, you were wrong.
Love obsessional stalkers tend to be persistent in their pursuit of their victims.
These stalkers fantasize about the victim being a romantic partner, and when that fantasy
clashes with reality, the stalker often tries harder and harder to get noticed.
Increasingly drastic means may ensue. Negative or positive attention may not matter,
as long as their victim notices and in noticing, becomes a part of the stalker's life.
3) Erotomania
Related to love obsessional is erotomania. These cases are usually women who
actually believe that the victim knows and loves them. David Letterman has a woman
who breaks into his house and steals his car, and she insists she is Mrs. Letterman every
time she is caught. These stalkers are characterized by mental problems including
delusions. They truly believe that their fantasies are true. Less is known
about these stalkers than the other types because they are often treated for their other
mental problems rather than for the stalking behavior itself.
4) False Victimization Syndrome
In these very frustrating cases, the stalker may believe that he is the victim.
Sometimes he even reports his victim to the police as having stalked him.
In these cases, the true stalker is usually the one who
initiated contact, although this is not always so. In all cases, the stalker holds
the victim in very high regard and will consciously or unconsciously imitate his victim's
style, speech, dress, habits, etc. Some stalkers go so far as to buy a house with
the same floor plan, trade in his car for a model like the victim's, or even make a career
change to the victim's chosen profession. The stalker will rationalize his behavior
by saying, "I can do it better". In reality, this kind of stalker suffers
from a severe lack of self esteem. He feels very inferior to the victim whom he
admires greatly, although he will rarely admit this to be true. These stalkers,
believing themselves to be inferior to, or wronged or rejected by the ones they admire
most, begin harassing and following the victims, spreading tales, keeping tabs, and in
many instances plotting revenge. Very frequently these are same-sex stalkers.
In false victimization syndrome, the stalker is extremely manipulative. Very frequently he
convinces himself and others that the victim is the one at fault, when in truth the victim
frequently would have had no contact with or knowledge of the stalker if the stalker had
not begun a campaign against him. Often the victim is reported to the authorities
for defending himself from the stalker. You may hear from this stalker things like,
"You are your own stalker" or, "You only know one side of the story."
Frequently delusional and always irrational, when presented with the facts,
this stalker will rationalize and manipulate everything he can and ignore even a direct
question, in order to preserve his fantasy of being the victim. He will initiate
conflicts and then twist them in his favor in an attempt to gain positive attention for
himself. He wants, in a nutshell, to be like his victim and when he feels that he
does not measure up, his motive is to bring his victim down . Sometimes this means merely
trying to ruin his victim's reputation by spreading lies and rumors. Other times,
this means murder.
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